May 9, 2010

May 9, 2010,
 I signed on with the title "Living Life by the Seat of my Pants".  Earlier I often said, somewhat jokingly,  I would one day write a book titled "Flying by the Seat of My Pants" and thus thought this to be the perfect title for my blog.   After all, it is pretty much how I attack most things in my life.  Probably not what one would expect from a self-proclaimed perfectionist who walks an obsessive tightrope.  After a little research I discovered the phrase was taken by more than one, and to be honest...well let's just leave it with we had nothing in common.  So I chose to eliminate "flying" and insert "Living Life".  After a week or so I shortened it to simply "Living Life".

When I began, I'm not certain I had a true sense of direction,  but as I described my mode of operandi earlier, I jumped in headfirst hoping words would clear the path and take lead.   My first post was filled with, in my daughter's words, "every possible disclaimer", lest anyone think I believed myself to be a writer.

With a few posts under my belt, and after reading many wonderful and focused blogs, I found I didn't really fit into a particular buttonhole.  I've always been the rectangle trying to squeeze into the square. I have far more interests and likes than one person should try to fit into a life.  My musings were not coming together quite as I had imagined, some sounding forced, others scattered.  I often sat down to write of one thing and found words, sentences, running in a totally different direction.   To describe where I seemed to be headed I soon added the subtitle,
 "Random Ramblings of a Blessed Life".

Now here I am, a month into my fifth year, and I have no better sense of where I am going than I did the first time I hit publish, sending those beginning words into cyberspace.   Yes here I am.  What does tomorrow bring...life.

Life is an adventure, full of joy, disappointment, success, failure, confidence and fear.  There will always be cheerleaders and more who will discourage.   Life moves fast.  We can run with it or hide.   I choose to turn my face to the sky, embrace, look for the blessings and give thanks for each morning.

A great big thank you to all who sent best wishes upon the birth of my beautiful grandson.  He is truly an amazing addition... miracle... to living this random life of mine.

Smitten

I have a new man in my life.

We met in the wee hours of the morning a little over

a week ago, and I unapologetically smitten.

It has been a happy week.  

Samuel "Wyatt"  was welcomed into the world 

May 29, 2014.

Life continues to advance forward.

A new generation.

And I am blessed.

Wrapping Up

I've been away! 

Yes I've been away both physically, and I suppose some might say mentally.   The spring is almost always the busiest time of the year both in and out of the classroom.  There is more to do than minutes in the day.  Perhaps this is why I have been posting about the pleasure of stealing time to breathe, and moments of quiet and beautiful contemplation.

This year has been a bit different.   Instead of waiting until May to begin my end of the year projects,

I am spending my time peddling to stay ahead.  If you have been with me for long you know this means...end-of-the-year books.  Our first grandbaby...grandson... is due in May;
 I cannot afford to be caught off guard.  

  

I thought it would be easy to stay on task, up to date, and be able to do all the other things I enjoy.  Life doesn't always operate the way we think it should.  I often tell friends who are adamant about controlling the direction of a situation, "tell God your plans and watch him laugh".   I accepted a long time ago life is not on my timetable, but his.  All I can do is listen, try to keep up and do my best.

I have kept up with school fairly well, but I have found I am not always able to do the things I have enjoyed in the past.   My stack of books is gaining height, but I am unable to spend quality time with them.   The gardens (and weeds) are surviving with minimum care.  Time with friends is hurried: a glass of wine after an appointment, a quick text or an evening walk.   Thoughts and words are harder to corral. When they do begin to whisper, I am not always at a place where I can write them down, then they...poof...disappear.

I am not complaining, for you see, we are anticipating the miracle of a new life.
Many months ago, I felt things falling apart.  It was a time when each morning I would hold my breath waiting for the phone to ring, and another rug to be pulled out from under me.   They were going faster than I could jump to another.   At the lowest point, when I was most frightened and angry,  I told God I was running out of rugs to be taken.  No sooner than the words entered my thoughts a voice whispered, "I will replace them with more beautiful rugs".  I have held that promise close, and now, I am waiting for Samuel Wyatt to make his appearance.  Beautiful, isn't it?

Please be patient with me, I will continue to occasionally disappear.  I enjoy our time together.  I appreciate each one of you, and am truly blessed by all who continue this path with me.

Yes, I am truly blessed!

Time

Seconds turn into minutes,

minutes into hours,

hours into days,

and days into weeks...

Whenever I had a school assignment weighing on me, my Mother would patiently listen to

my complaints, seldom offering up a suggestion or giving an opinion.  Instead, after sitting with me while I whimpered and whined she would stand, place a hand on my shoulder and say, "well I suppose you need to get busy, 'time waits for no man' ".

Whenever I begin to fret over my ever growing to-do list, I often

  think of her gentle hand and words sending me off to stay on task.  

It is so easy to get tangled up as time rushes us forward.

   

Mother was right, the hands of time doesn't halt his march,

 nor slow his pace.

Sometimes, though, it is necessary to pause on the bridge 

between the land of need to dos and the island of should dos

and allow time to continue his passage without us.

I don't want to miss one amazing thing!

"For somewhere he has spoken 

about the seventh day in these words: 

'On the seventh day God rested from

 all his works.' " Hebrews 4:4.